Thanksgivemas

The past year has been....enlightening. In many ways. That's a good, even great, thing by many measurements, yet I wish this kind of enlightenment on only the sturdiest bodhisattva. I have found things in the past year that were as painful as they were edifying, and I have grown proportionately. Hence:

I am infinitely thankful for the people in my life. There are so many things for which to show gratitude, but life has shown me that all else is secondary at best. There is no priority to the following list, just a Niagran (yes, I just made that word up, but my $20k English degree from FIU gives me license) flow of thanks and humbling sense of gratitude that fills my heart and mind in perpetuity. Read to the end, if you will, and you will find my sincere thanks for you if not individually, but as one of the improbably amazing people in the carnival of mayhem I call life.

My mother is the beautiful constant in my life. Constant giving, constant caring, and selflessness that she inbues in, apparently, everyone for whom she cares. She is the reason I am here, literally, but not just because I sprang from her womb. She demonstrates dignity and compassion, pragmatism and patience, and has taught me that while humans are an imperfect species, there is perfection among them / us. Her mother, my incredible grandma, does likewise for all of us, and is the most dignified and graceful person I have ever known.

My daughter is the rockstar I am honored to idolize. Kellye, your integrity is monumental and impressive. You live your life as an example of honesty and moral focus worthy of universal admiration. You have just started your journey into adulthood, and I want you to know that I am here for you in any way you need me. You inspire and humble me. While you are still a teenager, you are one of the most mature and adult people I know. My heart swells with pride to the point of bursting whenever I think, speak, or hear about you. Love is a word that is thrown around like a football at a tailgate, but know my love for you is unending and immeasurable. I am beyond fortunate to have you as a daughter, and, more importantly, a friend.

My brother is truly that. He is a brother in the journey, a brother in the struggle, a brother in the victory. It took us years to find each other, but the finding is that much sweeter for the effort. David, you are my confidant and confessor, and I love you.

I have two sisters, as different as you can imagine. Yet, each is so dear and amazing to me, it is an embarrassment of riches I hardly deserve. Melissa, watching you grow into the person I now know is as impressive as it is incredible. Your wonderful children reflect your wisdom, your humor, your intellect, your joy, and your love. While we have sometimes disagreed, we have always been so close. Thank you for allowing me, Uncle Scooter, a Junior Associate membership in the club you and Davis should be so very proud to guide.

Veronique, you are the embodiment of unconditional love. You show me patience and joy when everything seems bleak. I love the person you have become. You give your family all you have, in endless supply, without a consideration of limitation or judgement. You do so every day, and that inspires me no end. Your values guide you, and they are so ingrained in your heart as to let you follow it without hesitation. Will and Ruben are your equal and your reflection, and I value most highly the love you share with all of us.

Connor, you are the coolest kid ever. Period. You rule, you are awesome, and don't EVER cut your hair. Thanks for sharing your world with me.

My friends earn that title every day. I am rather stingy with that title, but I know, more than at any point in my life, that mine are truly the greatest gift I could hope to receive.

Jean and Jere are, obviously, the safety net in my trapeze act. And while I am not the greatest trapeze artist, I am an exceptional net chooser. You guys are love personified. You share unendingly, laugh and cry with me, accept my (many) faults with my (few) qualities. This year, you helped me understand that I am a person of value, while there were those that would have me think otherwise. You allowed me perspective on myself, helping me see the light at the end of the tunnel, while I struggled to believe it existed.

My stormiest sea is quieted by you, Patrick. As only the truest friend would, you gave me honesty, sage advice and true caring when I needed it most. You steeled my resolve when the miscreant misanthropes would try to break me. Everyone that knows you is impressed and amazed. I am honored to be among them.

I can never express the friendship Frank gives me, other than to say it is the bread that sustains me, even through my occasional stint in self-imposed solitary confinement. Your heart is so big and warm. Your instincts and acumen are legendary. I am, at the risk of being redundant, humbled to thank you for all you've done for me. Know that while I can never repay you, I will go to my grave trying, should you need me.

Justin is the Buddha I never expected. We have traveled the same path in many ways - not to say mine is equal or even comparable, just similar - and your wisdom is something I feel you don't appreciate enough in yourself. Thanks to you, I know: that if you step in crap, it just smells worse; I buy quality goods and services because I deserve them; and I will NOT be a part of abusive or unhealthy relationships (repeat3x).

Flash inspires me to work harder and smarter than I ever knew I could. Every day. With passion. I know nobody that balances drive, humility, and love for life and family the way you do. Thanks for being one of my most awe-inspiring heroes.

DH, you are a hero to many of us, but I hope that most haven't needed your benevolence and caring as I have this past year. And, as always, you give massively and unconditionally. You astonish me (and all who know you) with your unique ability to turn unbelievable potential into laser-focused action. Your brilliance is only outshown by your generosity.

Marco and Dean, we are in interesting times, and you both give me strength for the struggle. You intellect, vision, and commitment helps me pump my legs when there are 11 defenders horse-collaring our efforts. We will score, and it will be a touchdown dance worthy of Deion. While our mission is not a always a personal one, you have both shown me friendship in amazing ways. The 30+ years I have known you, Dean, give us a bond that gets us through our differences and lets us appreciate each others' strengths and value. Marco, you give me stability and insight every day. Thank you.

Peter, while you have retired from being a musician, you are truly life's artist. Your friendship and guidance is invaluable to me, and I thank you. You have taught me much about life, especially about integrity. We really should go diving more, though...

To those of you that have shown me how fallible my character judgment can be, thank you. Perhaps most of all. Your moral bankruptcy and conscienceless self-absorption shine light even more brightly on the truly tremendous people in my life. Your compunction is obvious from afar, and weighs heavily and perpetually. Start or continue to seek professional help so your children might overcome your lack of moral rectitude. While I now know, thanks to the massive and supremely generous support group mentioned above, that your heinous behavior is only reflective of yourself, it is a lesson well earned. I am learning to appreciate the purity of intent and unconditional love and support I give my family and friends without hesitation. I really like that about myself, and pity you for having neither the decency, integrity nor character worthy to celebrate it with me. And, far more importantly, them.

In closing, I am OK. And I have you all to thank for that. Every day. More than I can express. But to thank you for being in my life is too selfish and granular for the level of appreciation I hold. Thank all of you (the final group notwithstanding), the greatest people I could hope to know, for being great friends to your friends, great family to your families, and for being in the world. It would be a far less liveable planet without you.